for me... there's only Black and white

Sneeking on work's computer to type this in...

Sun, 08 Jul 2007 00:15:50 GMT

though I kinda doubt that the shop really cares...... I'm really the only one who's really working there anyways. Before I gotten to work though, I dropped off Gilbert back at the beach since he said that he'll be able to go home from there, the younger teen I picked up last night. I have a feeling that we'll be running into each other again.

And once again the other workers think I'm worrying too much about my dreams and my black side..... They really ARE ignorant......... especially about my black side. They really haven't seen that at work yet, and I really don't want to show them either.... though it might be hard by this point since their driving me nuts. I'm really starting to think that they're purposely trying to let out "Black Haru" to really see if it's really "all that bad I say it is"..... Bakas, the lot of them! I think I'm gonna start looking for a new job at the rate these guys are going. *sighs* but I'm kind of having trouble in finding jobs at this age.

These are the choices I have in front of me at the moment:

Book Store
Fast Food Restaurant
Car Body Shop

....... VERY limited in my case..... I'm already working in a Car Body Shop.... I'm not really crazy about take out so and I don't really read much...... So I could just find another job in another body shop........ I'm looking into more of my options..........

an.... intresting night....

Wed, 04 Jul 2007 01:05:16 GMT

I just went to the beach to clear my head... but I ran into this stoned boy. He looked about two or three years younger then me... I can't tell if it was the drugs or if he really was hitting on me. But either way, I brought him home. We had a odd conversation before we started to drive off... ending with him crying himself to sleep...

And I also.... Remember that the promise was to make sure I came back with a way to get her out of an "abusive" home... I think that word was the thing that made him even more upset, because it seems that he became more limp with tears when I said it.

What also got me thinking.... was what he said right before he burst into tears...

"In this place you can't remember anything and the stuff you do remember you don't want to remember because it's awful.." The rest was a bit nonsense, but it could be his actual way of thinking, so I can't really blame him for saying it.

If this place don't have us remember our actual past... gah... I can't really thing right now. I'm going to try to sleep on the couch...

What's going on?!

Tue, 03 Jul 2007 18:54:38 GMT

Promises... I know I made such a thing to someone but I don't remember who... Was it to that girl in my dreams? Sadly it kills me that I don't remember anything about what happened that I needed to give her a promise. In the dream it all pieces. The girl at first had long black hair... but a second later it was short, and she had bruises all over her.

Oddly enough, I don't remember how I even gotten the other personality, my "black side" I sometimes call it. Right now I'm in my normal state of mind... my "white side" but my black side is more the violent one.

But ever since I had that dream about that girl I've been thinking of that... Promise. That I would come back to her once I find a way... and then my mind go blank after that. What does this mean... I'm getting frustrated and my Black side been coming out more often then I want to. Been getting into fights lately because of the fact I get ticked off a bit too easily. Well I have to go to work right now...